why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
