See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
