i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
