after a month anything with tits is on the radar
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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