i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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