Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Ladies don't puke and tell
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
