butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
