I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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