Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
