you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
