Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Randomize
