Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
