so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
