dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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