similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
How does one acquire holy water?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
