Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
