She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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