I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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