I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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