Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
