My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
