You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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