ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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