My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
