did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
