Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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