couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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