Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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