Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
