Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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