okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
did you just send me my own nude
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
