once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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