I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
