i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
she peed on how many people?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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