Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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