It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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