Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
i believe in u and ur pee
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