She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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