trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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