Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
