Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize