: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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