some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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