i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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