Porn is love you can see.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I could make wine with my vomit
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
