Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
