And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
