I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
YAS. BRING CRAB.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
