i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
