so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
